Soccer fan after all?

I think we all remember how I feel about soccer, right? If not, my feelings for soccer can be summed up as such: I don’t get it. KC has caught the bug. KC loves soccer and Sporting is having another great season. This past month Kansas City hosted its second Major League All Star game. Last year’s MLB All Star game was great for KC and so was this year’s MLS game.

Here’s 6 things I don’t get about soccer.


All about the gear, right?

1. Scarves.

Trophy Wife: “Do they play in the winter in Europe or something?”

Cute Boy: “Why?”

Trophy Wife: “Because why else is everyone wearing scarves?!”

Cute Boy: shakes head

We had a little pre game fun before the all star game. This is my kind of soccer outing.


Salad, polenta, and crustini with mozzarella


Corn salad and brisket sandwiches (Cute Boy’s, duh)  Marg (mine, duh)


I am wearing a Sporting shirt and I’ll say this about soccer apparel: They’ve got the market on comfortable shirts! Adidas shirts are SO soft!

The pregame show was cool:





There were even special vendors for this special game:


This guy was selling Beef Carpaccio…in a tux

2. Chants. Soccer fans are all about chants which, as a former cheerleader I do enjoy. However, I have an issue with some of the chants the KC Sporting fans do. One in particular. It goes like this: K-C Wiz, K-C Wiz, K-C Wiiiiiiiz. It’s about the Wizards. The old name for KC’s soccer team. They aren’t the Wizards anymore. WHAT ARE YOU CHANTING ABOUT?! Also, there are some people in the “Cauldron” (the section where the craziest soccer fans sit, they start all the chants – one of them plays a drum) that seem to be chant leaders. One girl spent the whole game jumping up and down, waving her hands to encourage chanting. I never once saw her look at the field. I don’t think she even likes soccer.

3. Time counts up in soccer. What? That is backwards. At one point in the first half:

Trophy Wife: “How long is a half?

Cute Boy: “Forty-five minutes”.

It was 21 minutes in. That’s when I knew it was going to be a long night.

The halftime show was a really cool mix of pyrotechnics and fireworks. But upon completion the stadium was full of smoke and the field littered with debris. I wondered if the whole thing had been thought through or not.


Random Trophy Wife musing: “Do you think it’s an American thing that we are into sports with our hands and the rest of the world was like “Fuck it, I’ll use my feet!”

Cute Boy: shakes head

4. Guys constantly warming up on the side line. I mean, I guess I do get that, you gotta stay warm and loose it’s just a strange sight to see when you are used to baseball players sitting in a dugout or football players sitting on benches. I kept getting distracted by them and watching them run sprints on the sideline.

5. Injuries. The first time I saw a game, one of the players fell down, I assumed from an injury and play just continued. I was appalled! How rude of everyone to keep playing while this poor guy was hurt! Cute Boy clued me in that play doesn’t stop because so many injuries in soccer are faked. What? Seriously? There are things in life you fake. Injuries is not one of them!

6. Fans cheering. This is it. The number 1 thing I don’t get about soccer. If Cute Boy is still reading this post he’ll stop right now because he thinks I’m completely stupid for this one. He thinks I just don’t get it. I DON’T!!!

The fans, they cheer…for nothing. That’s not true. They cheer because the ball is close to the goal. Close. Close only counts in hand grenades and horse shoes. It does not count in soccer. But I’ve realized soccer isn’t like football where you can cheer for a great pass, a long run, a huge hit or a great stop on 3rd down. Soccer isn’t like basketball where you can constantly cheer for a basket, a great shot, a big block, or a quick steal. Soccer isn’t like baseball where you can cheer for a home run, a great hit, a stolen base, or a needed strike out. The only thing to cheer for is a goal. And sometimes it doesn’t happen the entire game. Or it only happens a few times per game. So you have to cheer for…nothing.

What’s that? You want to hear about the actual game? Well, AS Roma beat the US All Stars 3-0.


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